"The African Aphrodisiac Adventure"
A GH Parody - - Spring 1996

Chapter Sixty-Three




"Good grief!" gasps Lucy Coe as she glanced at the group hurrying towards her. Leading the bunch is the Masked Man, followed closely by many people she never thought she'd see again. "Robert? Anna? You're not dead??"

"Not hardly," Robert grins as he motions to the door. "This is the Rat's hole?"

"I think so," Lucy nods. "Well, you see, I don't actually remember the entry, you see, I didn't exactly see it but not with my eyes, well, with my mind's eye-that is, psychically...."

"Uh, right," Kevin agrees. "Lucy was blindfolded..."

"I get the picture," Robert nods. "Okay, fan out. Debbi, locate this entrance on the computer and check for all exits."

Seconds later, Debbi answers, "Two additional exits shown-This door opens into a large area with exits off sectors F9 and K7. As for exits to the surface, two known-F7S and K5S-S being surface."

Swiftly dispatching agents to cover all known exits, Anna smiles "We've almost got him, Robert."

Suddenly, she pauses as across the corridor, her eyes meet those of a disbelieving Robin. "Robin?"

"Mom?? Dad??" Robin's voice nearly breaks as she sloshes across the corridor to hurl herself into Anna's arms. "Mom, I knew you and Dad weren't dead..."

"Uh, Cowboy," Luke admonishes Lucky who is standing next to Adam, stunned.

"Sir?" he says, fully aware that he's in deep er, sheep.

"Cowboy, you and Adam will escort Miss Scorpio to the surface ASAP, go directly to our house, do not pass go, do not collect your allowance for a long time!!"

"Uh, I can explain."

"You will," Luke promises. "Now, beat it!"

"Go with him, Robin," Anna says, "When this is over, we'll pick you up at Luke's."

"Okay, Mom," Robin beams. "But this better be good!"

Anna grins as she gets the signal that everyone is in place. "Now, let's do it!" Hmmmmmm


"You got everything?" Faison asks Ryan who is contemplating Anna's portrait.

"I didn't bring anything," Ryan reminds him."

"True. Still, I feel I should take that picture...or something."

"For what? To remind you of what you lost? Forget her! No, I've got a better idea. Besides, this place will be flooded in no time, and the last thing you want to do is to waste time over a picture of the woman who cost you so much."

"So what's your better idea?"

"Here." Ryan uncaps and hands him a felt tipped pen. "It's a time honored tradition..."

With a gleam of understanding in his eyes, Faison takes the marker, and with his small cigar clinched in his teeth, approaches the painting. Seconds later, he stands back, grinning.

"Well done," Ryan congratulates him. "Now, let's beat it!" Hmmmmm


Suddenly, the door to the posh subterranean apartment is kicked open, and in dash several agents who, guns leveled, catch Faison and Ryan unawares. Anna, eyes wide in disbelief, is momentarily speechless. Then, she asks, "A mustache and goatee??"

"It's over, Anna," Faison explains with a shrug of explanation. "We're both free-I don't love you anymore."

"Not quite over," Robert amends. "We're free, but you're both under arrest."

"For what?" Faison demands.

"Ducknapping," Lucy tells him. "And for kidnapping that other maniac."

"Among other things," Robert injects.

Ryan comments to Faison who is shaking his head in disbelief, "You see, I told you that they'd come."

"There's a chemical lab in here," Frisco tells Robert "With enough AA to cause a population explosion if we don't get it out of here before the place floods."

"See to it," Robert directs him, and then turns to Anna as Faison and Ryan are led, handcuffed, away. "It's over now, luv. We can return to the surface and take our places in society again."

"You can have your job as PC Commissioner back," Mac tells him. "I'm gonna be busy with the Outback, the PI business and my new wife-the soon to be former Felicia Jones. Uh, Kevin, you'll be my best man?"

"Only if you'll be mine," Kevin says. "Lucy?"

"Doc?!?!? Felicia, will you be my matron of honor?"

"If you'll be mine..." Hmmmmmmmmm


And so ends the African Aphrodisiac Adventure. But, as this is a soap, and as soaps never really end, I have left loose ends to tease your imagination. Will Edward ever regain control of ELQ? What does Tracy do with her newfound family and the megabucks she's set to inherit?? Does Sonny ever show the Masked Babe his etchings?? Do Brenda and Jax reunite, or does she run of to San Francisco with Andy?? If she does, does Kell make good on her threat to make a move on Jax?? Do the catacombs flood before the AA is removed?? Does anybody ever learn that Garcia whacked Damian?? And, what about Carly? What about Frisco?? Does Stefani win a Pulitzer prize for her coverage of The African Aphrodisiac Adventure? Or, does Tiffany Hill retake Port Charles by storm with her incredible TV reporting? Does Jason remember the Qs? Is his amnesia fading? Do Kat and Damian ever thaw out, and return, cured, to again plague Port Charles? And, what becomes of all the chatters from PC Online who graciously participated in the tale? Hmmmmm